How to bargain in Vietnam and not get yelled at

Impossible! Or at least it has been so in my experience because when bargaining in Vietnam, getting ripped off is only a secondary concern to the risk of getting yelled at. Learning this has been somewhat difficult for me, coming from a country where items are sold with fixed prices and the general rule is that the customer is #1, but after a few colorful experiences myself, I have learned a couple of key rules to lessen both the risk of getting yelled at and ripped off.

- When it comes to bargaining in Vietnam, the most important thing to understand is that Vietnamese people are highly superstitious and Vietnamese sellers are even more so. Because this is a predominantly Buddhist country, fears about bad spirits, omens, and bad luck dominate Vietnamese thought and highly influences how people conduct themselves. We have all seen the altars bearing fruit offerings in Vietnamese stores back home, but in Vietnam, Vietnamese shopkeepers go a step further. I will explain.

If you ever get a chance to walk around Saigon’s biggest fabric district (Dong Khanh area in Chinatown), take careful notice of plastic bags full of fabric and paper pieces thrown into the street in front of shops. To anyone else, these plastic bags are simply bags of trash that are customary sights in the streets of Saigon. But no, these fabric pieces are cut from the desired fabric of customers who came in, bargained on this specific fabric, and ended up not buying it. What shopkeepers will then do is burn these fabric pieces/ paper and pray to spirits to bring bad luck on the customer. Sounds off, right? I know, but Vietnamese people really believe this stuff, so much so that customers are willing to bend their backs to sometimes purchase items they don’t really want just to avoid this.

So, how then does this translate into bargaining?

Rule #1: Avoid bargaining in the morning. In fact, don’t even go out to buy stuff in the morning, unless it is to purchase fresh food. This is because Vietnamese sellers believe that if they have to haggle with customers in the morning, they will have a bad luck with sales for the rest of the day. If you do go in the early morning, you will surely get more than a few grumpy faces and get cursed out by sellers. For example, on an early morning bus ride headed to the countryside, my mom and I witnessed an old woman get cursed out by a young bread seller for attempting to haggle. The bread seller cursed the old woman for bringing bad luck to her sales and continued to curse even as the old woman quickly handed over her money. It was ridiculous, but this is just an accepted fact in Vietnam.

When I went shopping with my aunt (again, on an early morning) in Saigon’s famous An Dong market, my aunt bought underwear she didn’t want from this one stall out of fear that they would not only yell at her, but get the other stalls to join in and jump us. On hearing this, Tammy and I thought, “Paranoid much?” but then we asked the rest of our family and they just shrugged their shoulders and were all, “Yeah, that happens.” When I was in at a market in Hue, word was going around that a woman had her pants pulled down by a shopkeeper after giving the shopkeeper a hard time by haggling too low. What the heck, right? But, I guess that’s just the way it is. I guess.

Also, the later you go in the day, the better deals you will get. By the end of the day, sellers just want to get rid of stuff and are much more flexible with the asking price. You will get even better prices if it is raining outside.

Rule #2: Forget the whole “the customer is #1” mantra we are taught in the U.S. Back home (generally) even if browse through the whole store and don’t purchase anything, you aren’t given any attitude. Here, however, if you just simply browse and touch an item without buying it, you are given a LOT of attitude. Most likely, you will leave the store/stall with a grumpy face staring you down. If you attempt to bargain, you will certainly get attitude. First comes the incredulous look from the sellers, their “what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-you-for-even-suggesting-that-price” face. If you are persistent with your haggling, their pissed off look and tone of voice just gets even more rude that even when you have bargained the item down to a reasonable price, you no longer feel like buying it from them because they give you so much attitude.

This has been the most difficult part of bargaining for me to get used to. The moment I sense a bit of attitude, I just want to leave. The best way to handle this is to not argue and just leave if the attitude really gets on your nerves. It really isn’t worth causing a ruckus over because the shopkeeper WILL get the support of the other sellers in the market. And when it reaches that point, you have no idea what can happen.

Rule #3: Try to bargain for 50% of the asking price. The shopkeeper will immediately say no, but if you are persistent and try to talk the shopkeeper into it, you might be able to get away with it. This is how you should approach it. Ask for 50%, then say that you’re considering buying more than one item if they’re willing to bargain with you. They will say no, that business is slow, and your sort of bargaining is only hurting their business. This is when you start walking away. 60% of time, the moment you turn your back, you will get called back by the shopkeeper who is suddenly more than willing to bargain.

Be aware that whatever price they ask of you and whatever price you end up buying, even if it is 50%, even 40% of the asking price, the seller is still making a profit.

Rule #4: Don’t express too much interest in the item you want to buy. When shopkeepers know that you really like an item, they are less willing to bargain because they know that you are willing to pay a bit more for it. What I have learned is that when you really like something, pretend that you’re kind of indifferent to it. Even better, criticize it. For example, there’s a decorated jewelry box you really, really like. It’s hand-painted, with intricate details made out of eggshell pieces. It’s gorgeous and you really want it. Instead of going, “OMG, this is so gorgeous. Look at the craftsmanship on this piece,” you should say, “It’s pretty, but the quality of the paint is not that great and will definitely flake off in short time… There’s also a small scratch right here. See? Right here. You have to look closely to see it…Are you really sure it’s out of wood because it feels fake to me.” Find all the faults you can in the item. If you can’t find any, make some up. Then say, “Because of these faults, I’m only willing to buy it for ___ price. Take it or leave it.” If you did a good job in criticizing their merchandise, there’s a good chance you will walk away with a good deal.

Rule #5: Don’t be a foreigner. Sorry, but the truth is that no matter how good you think your bargaining skills are, if you are a foreigner (i.e. not Vietnamese), you will get ripped off. When you ask a shopkeeper for the price of an item, there are two prices—one reserved for Vietnamese and the other one for foreigners. Often, the asking price for foreigners is twice the amount asked of Vietnamese. Shopkeepers even admit it themselves. This one time, I asked for the price of this purse I sorta liked and was told that it cost 1 million Vietnamese dong ($50)—a ridiculous price for Vietnamese standards. Even though I asked them in Vietnamese, they knew I wasn’t from around these parts so they just made up the highest price that came to mind. If possible, go with a Vietnamese local to buy stuff.

Rule #6: The biggest pitfall of haggling in Vietnam is converting all the prices into American dollars. DON’T DO THIS. In the beginning, everything seemed so cheap because I kept converting it to USD. “Wow…100,000 dong? That’s only 5 bucks. How can I not buy it?” Then, I go somewhere else and find out that I could get the same thing for 60,000 dong and I end up feeling a bit cheated. Yes, things in Vietnam are cheap when converted to USD, but just because it is cheap doesn’t mean that you are not getting ripped off.

Follow these bargaining rules in Vietnam and you will maybe, just maybe get away with good deals and not get yelled at by grumpy sellers. Of course, it is always smart to assess the situation before you begin bargaining—the seller’s attitude toward you, the type of market, the time of day, etc. Do so at your own risk…I’m serious!

Traveling with Vietnamese people

It's the last day of my week long trip to Singapore and Malaysia. It's been an...interesting one, to say the least. Interesting not because I got to see these modernized Southeast Asian country that are such a contrast from Vietnam, but mainly because I'm traveling on a tour with Vietnamese people. Traveling with Vietnamese people is--how can I put this politely--ummm...a lot of moments of asking the question, "What the hell is wrong with my people?" I'll just give case examples of why I will never, ever travel with my people ever again.

First of all, my people don't understand the notion of getting in line. There is a "me-first" mentality that is so frustrating and incredibly rude to other travelers. It's always the same. Everyone is in line, waiting, and then a Vietnamese tour group comes in. Without regard to any other groups around, the Vietnamese group will just rush to the front and push everyone else out of the way, while everyone else in line gives each other the "what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-these-people-face." And then when they do have to get in line, my people will loudly complain about having to get in line, comparing this injustice to being herded like a bunch of cattle.

Then, there is the matter of tasting the local cuisine. My absolute favorite aspect of traveling is sampling local foods. There is nothing better than to discover a new favorite dish in a foreign land. But, not Vietnamese people. Anything new tasting that is any detraction from the Vietnamese palette is immediately shunned. Travel agencies catering to Vietnamese know this, so the meals they book are ALL THE SAME (We've been literally eating the same variation of dishes for the past week..uggh). Whenever a local dish is served (which is rare), that dish is left untouched for being "wierd-tasting." But really, what can I expect from people who travel with a bagful of soy sauce, fermented fish sauce, and Vietnamese spices ready at every meal. I'm serious! On this tour, a few of the travelers complained that there wasn't any pho or Vietnamese noodles to eat...in Singapore.

The impracticality of how Vietnamese people dress is both an amusing and confusing sight. Normally, when traveling involves a lot of walking in 90+ degree weather, comfort is key. Comfortable walking shoes, light clothes, and obviously nothing to fancy because you'll sweat through it all anyways. But no, not Vietnamese people. Vietnamese women like to dress in their finest clothing--borderline formal dresses, heels, and a cake-spackled layer of makeup--which is all nice and all if it were for an evening out in town, not a trek up 200+ steps of stairs into mountain caves. And Vietnamese also like to stare at what you're wearing. Obviously from their stares of judgment at my ratty t-shirt, shorts, and comfortable flip flops, my clothes aren't exactly up to their fashion standard, but I'm not the one at risk of snapping my ankles while walking up steep stairs.

And the little Vietnamese kids on these tours are just horrible. On every tour I have been on, the kids that come along are spoiled rotten and shockingly rude. They scream, hit, and throw tantrums whenever they can't get what they want. Their parents only enable this behavior by catering to their every want and desire. I just look on, horrified at their behavior and fight the urge to slap these little bastards myself. Like every other tour, this one is not without a little spoiled bastard itself. Today, this little kid threw a tantrum about a candy he dropped on the floor by demanding his family to pay him back. He proceeded to act out his tantrum by hitting everyone in his family and calling his aunt a "crazy lady." Of course, everyone catered to him (including other adults on the tour), made excuses for his behavior, and went over to comfort him.

Vietnamese tours are also structured around shopping, which means that the Singapore and Malaysia that I have experienced has been from the inside of malls, jewelery shops, and Chinese medicine shops. Our tour guides get a piece of the commission from they money made at these stops, so they try to fit in as many of these shops as possible into the schedule. I end up just standing there, bored out of my mind while watching Vietnamese women waste their money on fake diamonds and rubies.

And then, there are the really ridiculous comments that Vietnamese people often state as fact. A sample below:

An old man explaining to us how the birds at a bird show in Singapore are trained:
-"Those birds in the show are fed drugs so that they can become addicted and perform those tricks."
Thinking to myself--Uhh..maybe in Vietnam, but not here dude.

Old woman picking at a plate of omelettes and fried rice:
-"Where is the pho and hu tieu for breakfast?"

Vietnamese "models" commenting on the dress of Muslim women:
-"I wonder why they cover themselves up like that. They actually have good figures, unlike Vietnamese women who don't cover up but have fat spilling out everywhere."
(This one was actually pretty funny).

Hating on other Vietnamese tour groups:
-"Uggh...they're Northerners. Damn dogs and monkeys. I wish the Americans would just go into the north and bomb them all."

Watching a group of Muslim children on a field trip:
-"Wow, they really go to school early here huh? I wonder if they also learn terrorism in school."

Our tour guide warning us about potential dangers:
-"It is high season, so watch out for pick-pocketers. Specifically, watch out for Indonesians who sneak into this country to steal. Also, watch out for the covered women in burqas."
(You can just hear the gasps of agreement coming from the Vietnamese tourists after we were warned of these "dangers")

A lot of the time I wanted to so badly throttle someone across the bus. Good thing, I had my buddy Tran with me on this tour to relieve some of the frustration by laughing at the ridiculousness of our people. There sure was a ton of that on this tour.

Vietnamese people crowded around to learn how to ride the subway in Singapore
Of all places they took us to--a cowboy town in Malaysia because us Americans went all the way over to Malaysia to learn about cowboys.

I just love their enthusiasm. I only wish we shared the same.
Taken with our tour guide, Tony. The guy ran, accidentally shoving an old woman out of the way to make sure that he got on the monorail with the tour group. Now that's dedication.

An Attack On All Senses

Right out of the airport, you’re immediately hit with a wave of heat so powerful it overwhelms all of your senses. You first notice the smell that is so distinct to Vietnam. Heated trash is the best way to describe it. Sometimes, when I’m walking down Telegraph in Berkeley, I catch that smell and it immediately brings me back to Vietnam. So when that freshly baked trash smell hit my nostrils, I just knew I was back in the motherland. Then, you feel your face become hot. Your cheeks redden and at the bridge of your nose, along your hairline, and the nape of your back, you feel perspiration form.

Your car then comes to pick you up and you catch the first glimpse of the city. It is chaotic and the heat only makes it seem even more so. You notice the brightly-colored buildings, the street after street of store fronts full of people trying to relax as much as they can to relieve themselves from the midday heat. And then, the motorbikes. Ah, the motorbikes. The motorbike is the lifeblood of Vietnam as much as rice is to our diet. You can’t talk about Vietnam without discussing the chaos of motorbikes zooming every which way and the barrage of noise—motors roaring, honking, and the kickup of dust and smog it creates that forms a constant haze over Saigon.

All of this becomes too overwhelming, despite your excitement of having just landed in the country. The heat, the smell, the cacophony of noise, the chaotic traffic and not to mention the long flight you had to endure—makes you feel tired, kind of numb from fatigue to even process everything. But once you finally have a chance to sit down to take a breather over a homemade bowl of hot and sour seafood soup, freshly cooked in a hotpot with family you haven’t seen for long time, it all sinks in.